Scared Single

I have been single for several months now and while it has its benefits, I do have my quiet moments where like Erykah Badu says "I want somebody to walk up behind me and kiss me on my neck". There is something so simple yet intimate about that one act that I daydream about it. The problem is that I want more than the kiss on the neck. I want the man to hold me an make me feel secure and protected. The one who "gets me" and my quirks and wants to do more than just "hang out". In many ways I feel like I am a novice in this new world of singles. Times have changed from when I was younger and more cavalier about who I dated. I have three children now. This means that I do not have a lot of free time, and the time that I do have I value like priceless gems. In a way this puts me in a better position to determine what kinds of things I desire and will accept. At the same time, I feel like I have set the bar so high that I have effectively enclosed myself in a box with high walls. This week instead of giving advice I have a question: Is it possible to date and have positive interactions without comprimising who you are? Oh and, is it really so bad to run a background check on someone once you know there first and last name?